An Indomitable Grace

I keep thinking of you
in that golden light
the rush of cars below, uncannily distant,
and the breeze.
Your eyes shone, drew me in, each fleck a different hue

I was terrified

You were so beautiful and still
(I only unwound slightly when you looked up at me
and smiled),
too certain of everything,
creating a field of unreality I’m not sure I’ll ever escape

my bottle of Tylenol a reminder,
still full of dust and broken tablets
from the impact against concrete,
a two story drop.

Did you throw my glasses out the window?

And I think of you alone, strapped to a hospital bed
but nowhere near care,
not where I can reach you,
an imagined picture of you
but your eyes just as bright as the last moment I saw them

My mind flees the loneliness and pain and fear
to a meadow
flowers in your hair
druid, sprite, made from earth
head in my lap
laughing
eyes like marbles

If you can feel me now,
that’s the future I will build for you,
away from metal and uniformity,
away from restraint

A quiet bower, a sleep
flowery bands, binding us to the earth
respite, respiring